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Sunday July 2nd 2000Leleleleleleleleleleleleleipzig calling, the day of the European Cup final, where we're due to play directly it's finished, not in Rotterdam, but at a local football stadium. By the way, wasn't Holland versus Italy the biggest nil-nil thrashing of all time? I thought Italy were playing for penalties from the kick off, come on France, show them how to play a GAME, and stuff them mightily in the process, s'il vous plait. But onto other bits... Terrible news about the tragedy at Roskilde, I know I go on, but getting shitfaced can sometimes have disastrous results. There HAS to be a degree of self restraint, and promoters must start taking action to stop this ever happening again... Talking of Denmark, we did Aarlborg. It seemed the cloud had found us, as it basically pissed down all day, but the Promoter assured us that it would get better. When we were eating and the heavens opened, I felt obliged to disagree, but even the cloud had to bow to the mighty Danes, and indeed buggered off, so it was only like the Somme when we went on. 
The usual enthusiastic crowd, and lots of totty. I don't know if by some freak of nature we're getting trendy or something, but I swear our audience is getting younger, or I'm going senile. I strongly suspect the latter...On to Brussels, where we had a day off. I went to the swankiest dinner party I've ever been to (even I've got posh friends… well, one.) It was full of Diplomats, directors of oil companies, computer magnates, etc. When I arrived, I wanted to turn round and go back to the hotel. I thought, this is totally out of my depth. 2 hours later, people telling filthy jokes, couples having huge rows and everyone's completely pissed. I had a brill time, invite me again, please. Do you really need to know that? You do really need to know, actually, 'cos at the dinner party I got totally pissed. Woke up next day... AAARGH! There's a show to do!! My mouth feels like the bottom of a birdcage (Gay response; well you have had a cockatoo in it! Boom Boom! ) and my head... what head? A woman took a bottle of vodka back to a supermarket, and told the manager she wanted a replacement, as she had drunk the whole bottle the night before and it had given her a headache! True story... 
Felt cack all day, but of course no one else in the band did. I sometimes feel I'm the only one flying the Rock and Roll flag, but then I look at the crew and think (cue Michael Jackson music "You are not alone." In fact you are not in their league. I've arrived at gigs before, and some of the colours they have turned as a result of the previous nights/days/weeks activities don't actually exist, I swear! Got to the festival, "15 Years of Graspop" it was called, in a little town somewhere in the middle of Belgium (padding.. go straight to jail, you 'orrible little man, curses, foiled again) where the cloud had gone direct from Denmark, and had it's revenge on the poor billy at the site. Met the guys from the mighty Uriah Heep again, who Francis and I thought sounded the best we'd ever heard them, and then it was Bjorn Again, which is not for me at all, on before us. Although it had stopped raining by the time we were onstage, it were bloody freezing oop there lad, and the poor billy had been pissed on all weekend. We were only OK, couldn't get the hands (or brain in my case) working, but they were really superb, well done each one of yez... Home for a couple of days, then on to Austria for 3 shows, which actually turned into 2, the first one, at Klam was postponed until July 28th, sorry about that, for all you people that turned up, including one guy who'd come 500 kilometres. 
Next day Kapfenburg, and an open air gig. Check me on this… If there's a massive air show, for 200,000 people going on 10 kilometres down the road, do you book a band to play on the same day, and charge to get in? I know I wouldn't. Anyway someone did, so we played, along with a band called Echte. They all looked about 10, and had a couple of great songs, they could be huge (which means if I like them, they'll be in the 'where are they now file' in 3 years time). Lots of young fans, who'd come to see Echte , but stayed and watched us, and we Rocked! Matthew was superb, and Paul even found a drop of sweat, I think it was water that he'd cunningly dropped there in a vain attempt to convince us he's human.Austrian girls are sooo gorgeous I gave them a real good looking at..Only about a thousand billy, but it's a show, so 100% it is. On to Weiner Neustadt, more of a regular gig, indoor, and great it was. I fell in love with an Austrian chick. Well, not exactly chick, she was about 70 I think, but standing right in front of me, rattling her necklace like there was no tomorrow, great vibe. You know, after the night before with all of the teenagers, and my new best fan here tonight, it's fantastic to see how we appeal to so many different kinds of people. I've got all the diplomats and the lot I went to dinner with coming to Rotterdam to see us, let you know on that one. I know there are political problems in Austria, but it's a great country, the scenery is amazing, and the people seem really nice, plus which they have Gosser beer, which the new beer boy (Matthew) gave a definite thumbs up to. It kinda makes you feel humble, bringing on the new boys. By the way, how's this for cool? I asked Hackerlogger if he wanted a link from our site, and he said bollocks! I suppose it's just as Groucho Marx once said, "I wouldn't ever join a club that would have me as a member" His site is worth checking out, but if you think I'm going to give you the address, dream on! 
There's a few sites to tell you about, firstly the Rhino's revenge site... did I tell you that I had an album coming out? Maybe I forgot.. anyway, all the blurb will be on www.rhinosrevenge.com which is being put together by Gert Ohlsson from statusquo.com. The site will develop into a fully blown site about my solo album... By The Way, Mike Hrano from FTMO is managing my solo album project, and he's doing a top job.Also, Beth the bitch is doing a site about me, it's at www.rhinosite.homepage.com, and there is also Tevye's great site dedicated to Andrew, at www.andybown.com. Mine's a Chateau Petreuse and Guinness. AB4PM The Rhynosawus xxxxx P.S. Thanks to Jurgen from the Arena Nova for the hospitality and the wine. He only had 900 different wines on his list, shame. |
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